You can do this!

Hey guys! My name is Mia, and I am almost 14 years old. I will be going into the eight grade. So basically i wanted to share my story with you guys right now because I just finished watching the movie "Bully" and i am not going to lie, but i was crying. Anyway, i a going to tell you about my story. 

 

It all started when I was in the 4th grade. My parents were going through a divorce, and all my friends thought that it was weird. So they began to pick on me. I remember the kids in my class saying that it was my fault for my parents divorce. I would get so upset that everyday I would try to convince my mom that I was sick so that i wouldn't have to go to school. Finally when school let out for the summer I felt like I could just be me again. When we went back to school in the fall, things seemed to have gotten worse. It went from every once in a while, to every day that I would be getting made fun of. Towards the middle of the year I started getting punched, tripped, and rammed into the wall. I could never muster enough courage to tell my parents. By the end of my fifth grade year I had completely forgotten when school was fun to go to. Over the summer I became depressed. I remember walking in the first day of the sixth grade, and not having anyone to talk to. The bullying got worse so I had started to cut myself. At this time I only had one friend. She was the only one who knew what I was doing, and I knew she hated it. On November 16, 2012 I attempted to kill myself. I texted my friend that I was sorry, and that I never meant to hurt her. When i woke up the morning after my attempt I felt horrible. When I showed up to school my friend was crying as she was going through my locker, she said that she would have missed me so much if I had been dead. The bullying had continued to get worse and my friend would call me every night to make sure that I was ok. On January 16, 2013 I had tried to kill myself again. I had texted my friend the same text as last time, and after another failed attempt, I went to school the next day only to have everyone talking about me. My friend friends phone was taken on the bus and when she got it back they went through everything and saw my suicide letter. Those people told the entire school, and the bullying was worse than ever. My friend had told one of the teachers because she was worried about me, and the school had to tell my parents. It was the worst day of my life. I had told my parents everything except the bullying. They thought that it was just that I was under a lot of stress. I had told them that I would never cut again, but it was only a month before it happened again. Finally I had finished 6th grade. That entire summer was of my parents asking if I was ok. When I had went into the seventh grade everything was the same as before. I had finally told my school asst. Principal about all the bullying. It made a world of a change. It didnt go away completely, but the physical bullying did. It got better. During the middle of 7th grade I guess you could say that I was "Hanging in the wrong crowd". I was raised going to church every sunday, and wednesday. So yeah, according to them it was the wrong crowd. I started smoking and drinking. It was a way to numb the pain without having to cut. I stayed with my group of friends until the end of the year. In the start of this summer I was trying everything that I could to try to keep my parents from finding out. It wasn't until a couple days ago that I realized that it does get better. I know that it doesn't really sound like it with the drinking and smoking, but I am trying to stop. Its been a year and a half since my last suicide attempt, so yeah it does get better. 

 

You can do this.

No matter how hard it may seem.

Please remember that yeah, it may seem hard now, but you will get through this.

If you are being bullied and scared to tell someone, I can completely understand. It took me almost 4 years to speak up.

Please tell someone. Even if its just your parents, an adult you trust, or even a teacher.

Things can change. Things can get better 

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