The first time I remember realizing I was the "fat kid" I was watching my friend run to second base and seeing the tendons behind her knees stretch and flex. Mine didn't do that, because they were too pudgy for anyone to see the tendons. From that day forward I was hyper aware of being the "big girl". And it was so strange, people could call me ugly, or nerdy, or stupid, and I would be fine. But the dreaded "fat", that was the end of the world, anything but that. The worst I remember it getting was in sixth grade computer class and a boy named Adam. I recall thinking to myself, "Why do you care if I'm fat? Why do you care about me at all? What have I ever done to you?" I tried so hard to hide it from my parents, especially because at that time my father was dying of cancer, but it wasn't always possible. Mother's know, they just know, and she would tell me, "Ignore them. You are NOT the problem, they are and it's themselves they don't like. They're just taking it out on you". And over all, it was some pretty darn good advice, but you can't always just let that anger and hurt go. It doesn't just disappear, you have to purge yourself of it. I lost the weight, and along the way I learned the world won't end if I stand up for myself, but sometimes the bullying WILL. And, most importantly I found my "thing". And all that hurt and resentment and anger and confusion, that was roiling around inside me for all those years, I use it. I channel it. It doesn't matter what your "thing" is, as long as it's something you're passionate it about. And you will take this negative, horrible experience and you will make it into something positive. Use it and you will win.