When I was a little kid, I looked up at everything bigger then me, which was just about everything, and thought life was the most amazing thing. When you're younger, all you have to worry about is falling down and scraping a knee, because quite frankly, nothing else seems to matter. As the years went by my love for life slowly lessened. I wasn't as amused by the little things, like I used to be. Going to school was something I dreaded everyday. School wasn't like how it used to be. Instead of drawing in coloring books and seeing who could count the highest, you have to deal with non stop drama. One story that I will always remember occurred in 6th grade. It was my birthday and it was also the homecoming football game for our school. I was so excited, my birthday was always my favorite day of the year. I was walking around the field so excited, having people come up to me and wish me a happy birthday. A group of around 5 girls stopped me, and said happy birthday Hannah. I thought it was weird because they never talked to me before. Then they said they got me a present and handed me a bracelet. I was really excited because I thought they wanted me to be part of there 'popular' group. But I turned the bracelet so it faced me and written on it was the word 'worthless'. They all started giggling and said I thought I should give it to you, I mean you are worthless. And every birthday since that one, i've dreaded. I was always so worried something would happen. The day I get to celebrate just for me, was ruined by some popular girls in 6th grade. Another one of my experiences had to do with the website ask.fm I thought it was cool to go on that website, you got to ask people questions and figure out what they thought about you. At first, I loved how you could ask questions on anonymous. But then I started getting hate like, you filthy whore. And one day I went to go visit my grandpa in the hospital. I pulled up the website and my newest question was "Do us all a favor and kill yourself". I was struggling with suicidal thoughts to begin with and they just added to it. But talking to people, you learn, you're not the only one going through this. It doesn't matter if they have it worse or better, you're all going through something and it really just sucks. But having people there for you that you can talk to whether it be a parent, a support group, a friend, a teacher, or psychiatrist, it really helps to just let your feelings out. Maybe you don't like talking about your feelings to other people. That's when you pull out a journal and write down everything that's bothering you on a piece of paper. When I did that I always use to tear it up afterwards and think of all those feelings going away as I tore it up. But I can promise you. Whether you believe it or not, people love you and cherish you and would do anything for you. Even when you're at your lowest point, you can always get back up and keep on fighting.
By writing some words below, you are showing your support and letting everyone know they're not alone.