I find it funny the way life works. One moment everything is going right and the next it seems like the entire world is crashing down. I was in elementary school when it all began. I remember kids making fun of the way I dressed, putting me down for mistakes I made, but to be honest, I never thought of it as bullying. I just thought it was a normal thing everyone did. Soon boys began to get involved with the bullying others did to me. I remember the first time I told someone about it, and their response was; "Do you know why he does it? He does it because he likes you." or "She does it because she is jealous of you." and after hearing those words, i just let it go. I was able to survive my lunch box years. When middle school came, the same thing occurred, except it was worse. Random people i didn't even know wanted to get into fights with me, rumors were being spread, but even though all of that went on I was able to keep my head up high and survive those two years. High school started...i began to fall apart. I got into my first relationship, and after that everything went down hill. The guy I was with put me down a lot and abused me...and i never told anyone...NEVER. After things ended with him, rumors were spread about me. His friends said things about me...my ex said we had slept together and i had some sort of disease...of course everything was just a bunch of lies. The only close friends I had turned their backs on me because of the things people were saying and then the end of my freshmen year came...and i did NOT want to go back. The rest of my high school career was the same story. Nothing but drama. People put me down more, my own teammates would take me down and make me feel like crap. My "friends" called me names, they'd hit me. I was sexually harassed by one of them...eventually raped..and i NEVER spoke out. I fell into severe depression and i just couldn't take any of it anymore...and to make things worse...being at home wan't a relief. I wasn't safe anywhere. I felt like i was useless, unwanted...i was told that i was a mistake and that idea just stuck with me. I couldn't take the pain anymore so I began to cut, i attempted suicide and at one point I had a major break down and i ended up in a mental hospital. Once i got the help i needed and was back on my feet, people did whatever they could to bring me down. They called me "emo" "psycho" "the crazy one" and apart from that i began to get cyber bullied....and i was just starting to fall apart once m ore. Luckily i only had a few months left of high school...but i ended up getting really sick. A day didn't go by where i didn't cry myself to sleep thinking of how horrible my life sucked. A day didn't go by where i wouldn't think about giving up...until one morning i realized that there's people out there in this world who have it worse than i do. I still go to therapy and i take medication to treat my depression...but now i'm looking to make a difference. I didn't get justice for what those people did to me..not even the rapist. They all got off with a warning, and i'm not joking. I'm eighteen now...and i stood up to the bullies myself. And now i'm in the process of getting my associates degree in Criminal Justice so i can become a cop or a juvenile probation officer and help those who are going through the same thing i went through or worse. I'm looking to make a difference, because in this life, everyone is a miracle and they should know it.
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