Not the stick and stones but the Words

I live in rural TN and it's not a normal thing to see a group of Indians like my family walkin' around and doing everyday things in the middle of a mass of white Christians. I think it was because of my darker skin and slightly different facial features that the boys in elementary school decided was enough to pick on me. They called me a butthole (not the word butt though) and said that the reason I was so dark was because I came out of my mother's butt(again,the word butt was not used) instead the "normal"way. 

In middle school, it got worse. Because we had matured and learned about the different religions and cultures of the world, Christian girls would seek me out in the bathrooms and tell me I would go to Hell for not believing in the Lord and that reincarnation was a bunch of bullcrap. They said that if it did exist, I would die and come back as a rodent that they would run over. I told my parents and immediate action was taken. Of course, the school's teachers and principal all turned a blind eye because they thought that it was ok.

I couldn't take it anymore....seeing my parents stressed over my problems and the fact that I just couldn't fit in had taken its toll. I considered suicide multiple times(trust me when I say more than twice a week) and slept with a knife in my hand in case I just decided to do it. Then, as if someone could hear my pain...a boy at school started treating me nicely and we became very good friends. After eighth grade, we both applied to a magnet school and got in. Things since have been looking up for me and I hope I can say the same for the future. 

Thank you for reading my story...because I decided not to commit suicide, and learned to block out the bad things in life, the few rays of hope in me has not died. I want to say that all it takes is a smile or wave to lift up someone's life and even stop them from taking their life.


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