my life in calories

I was diagnosed with anorexia, manic depression, bipolar disorder, anxiety disorder, and OCD when I was 15 years old. I was a freshman in high school, had a solid group of friends, and hid my secret from the world until I was too sick to not be noticed. I was sent to treatment in St. Louis. Unfortunately when I grew better and returned to school, the friends I once had were gone. The ones I loved turned their backs to me and spread rumors and gossip about me and my treatment stay. I had never been more alone in my life. My high school years consisted of my eating in the nurses office due to the fact that when I ate in the cafeteria kids would throw food at me, and when I would have a depression breakdown I would go and lay in the office and cry. I had to call my parents from school when things got hard and often had to leave early. People didnt understand my illness and instead chose to pick on me and make me feel miserable about myself. I had no friends, and once I graduated school I was so happy to be free. Little did I know that the years to come would be filled with cyber bullies and suicide attempts. Before I started my freshman year of college I attempted to take my life for a second time after yet another internet bully blast. I ended up in the psych ward for a time. I thought that I would never fit in anywhere, that I would never find anyone who understood or accepted me. But when I started school at Webster University, a liberal arts college in St. Louis, I was greeted with open arms. People didnt care what had happened to me previously, only wanted to help me through my hard times and do what they could for me. Now, 5 years later, 20 years old, Im sitting in my college dorm room on the last day of my freshman year of college. Ive made so many friends and am a new person inside and out. When people say things will get better, I used to think it was stupid. But now I look and see that they are right. Things, no matter how hard they are, WILL get better. You just have to keep strong and move forward with all your might, no matter what, and know that theres light at the end of the tunnel. I now use my art as a way to raise awareness about bullying and the effects it has on people.

Always always always try, and never give up. Even if its 5 years or more later, things do get better.

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