I Need Help/Advice!!!

So ive had a pretty crazy life. This started 4 years ago and this is happening to me still. I messed up once just once and i know family is suppose to be there for you but after 4 yrs of nothing but straight insulting comments and blaming it on me. I JUST CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE!!!

Im not perfect, and then again no one else is either. Shoot if we all were perfect this site would have never been invented. Well 4 years ago i messed up, got in trouble and it was 2 years of family telling me i was worthless, i was always getting talked down to and well i just wasnt accepted into the family anymore, family pictures i would be the one taking them, and if i was in them i would be on the outside just enough to that they could crop the picture and you wouldnt even notice. i mean i got used to it! Started to distance myself from everyone and no one noticed. Started To wear hoodies and hats all the time just so i could feel safe in my own space. 

Then 2 years ago i lost my friend to a car accident. A drunk driver hit him and 2 weeks later he passed away. My life was horrible i felt like the rug was taken out from under me and i felt empty. I stayed quiet for 3weeks straight never spoke a word to anyone. I kind was blaming myself, but then when i finally decided to say something I immediately got sat down and my "loving uncle" told me that i should have been the one in the casket and that no one would ever notice and care if i was to die. I mean yes I am adopted but he was telling me i was a worthless piece of crap and that I shouldnt even be living. That went of for awhile and JUST when i thought it was over and things were slowing down. It HAPPENED! i was out doing my own thing when everything changed. My "uncle" saw me out and told me this " I want to apologize"
ME being who i am, caring and understanding guy FELL for it!
He immediately started telling me that my dancing is pointless, ill never make it anywhere because he has talked to family and thats why they arent talking to me anymore. Yes he hates me more than ever and apparently family respects him. So if he says something that means its true. STUPID RIGHT?!

Well now im at the point when im trying my best to make a step forward and get away from it. Well that is pointless because i try to take a step forward and my life goes 10 steps back. I feel worthless like i don't know what to do anymore?!

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