Fighting The Battle Alone

It all started in the 5th grade. The bullying , the teasing, and the verbal and physical abuse. I just wanted to talk about being gay. I mean we live in a generation where we should embrace our differences no matter what they are. I mean hundreds of kids commit suicide every year just for being who they are and getting bullied for all these different reasons. It breaks my heart to think young people just like me are killing themselves because they cant be who they are and what they want to be. I personally know how they feel I mean I started cutting in the 5th grade because of bullying and I've attempted suicide 4 times. I've battled depression, I know how it feels to want to die but there's so much to live for. I remember one night in the 7th grade i came home from school and i was crying my eyes out. It was the worst day ever. I was just done with everything. I tell my mum everything and she doesn't even know that i went to the kitchen i got a knife and two bottles of pills then I went to my room. I was done with everything and I didn't want to live anymore but then I thought of how she would feel after and how my brother would feel. So I dropped the knife after I cut and I couldn't stop crying, I didn't want to put  them through that pain. So I guess you can say I didn't have the guts to end my life or you can say I was strong enough to keep fighting. When it comes to bullying its not necessarily the physical abuse that hurts the most its the verbal abuse the one that degrades a human and makes them feel worthless.The one that not even time can heal. But you got to remember your NOT!I know they might make you feel like you are but if you keep fighting.... you will win and you will feel so good after. And if you think no one loves you that your all alone your not, you never are! If I could make it through getting my head shoved in walls and windows, getting stuff thrown at me, getting called names everyday that made me feel worthless, I know you can to. I love you so much and please ,please keep fighting because one day you will win. Coming from someone who's in 10th grade now and started a GSA/LGBT club and an anti-bullying club. It gets better trust me.

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