Are you a lesbian?

I'm a girl with a sense of style no one else has. Somedays I will dress like a boy and others like a girl. But for some strange reason, that affected someones view on me. I'm the girl with the short pixie hair, which made people think I'm a lesbian and be "scared." 

Why though? Why should you be scared of something I'm not? This little lesbian thing for out to my whole grade and oddly enough, my phone number was leaked.

For weeks and for months, I would get text messages and emails like "Where's your girlfriend?" "People like you shouldn't be alive." 

My parents have a knife collection and that night I had an urge to let it out. I didn't want this anymore. It had been going on for too long. I already had slit my wrists in the past, but that wasn't enough. I wanted to be gone. For others not to be scared of me. 

I took a couple sleeping pills and two pain killers and worked at my wrists with a knife. After getting deep enough, I laid in a tub of warm water. My mom found me 5 minutes later and screamed at the top of her lungs. She carried me to the police station and yelled at the medics to take me away. 

I remember getting asked a ton of questions, "Why did you want to take your life." "Can you please explain to me what these scars are from." I remember responding with the same answer "Because I wasn't strong enough."

After two days at the hospital, I was told to stay for a youth group. 

I met 12 amazing people that helped me and that I helped as well. Out of those 12 people, one of them was a boy, a boy that I fell for. 

To this day, we spend everyday with each other.  Caring and watching Out for each other. 

Things do get better, but sometimes you need a little help. 

By writing some words below, you are showing your support and letting everyone know they're not alone.

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