My name is Bryan, I had been bullied for a long time off and on since kindergarten.  My first day of school ever I had to ride the bus, I was the only white kid in my neighborhood and the other kids called me names like "cracker" and "hick". I didn't know what any of this meant, I got held down and punched every day until we moved, almost a year later. Things got better, just the usual getting picked on every once in a while, most of the older kids that picked on me left when I was in second grade, all was well until 6th grade.

    In the sixth grade thats when I began to show symptoms of having turrets syndrome. No one knew what turrets was, there had not yet been any movies making fun of turrets yet, so when I started having head bobs and uncontrollably making noises, people caught on quite fast.  It was already bad enough that my family could not afford name brand shoes or clothing for me, now I was drawing attention to myself. I was a big kid, not fat, just tall and thick, so I did not get physically abused, but the talking behind my back and people pointing and laughing made me feel terrible. I hated myself, I did not know why I had to nod my head, or why I made sounds, my parents were not understanding, my dad was incredibly mean, yelling at me, calling me stupid (straight A student) and telling me to get out of the effing room because he was tired of hearing me. My doctor said I was acting out, I was just a burden to my parents and a weirdo at school.  I was the oldest of four, so I always felt the need to set an example, so I acted like it never bothered me. To be honest, this is the first time I have admitted that it bothered me. There was a lot more that happened, terrible moments I have always wanted to forget, but I can't forget.  Knowing how much it sucks helps me to be the person I am.  I am an adult now, almost thirty, I have an incredible career, make more money than I had imagined.  I just hope that someone who is going through what I went through can know, it gets better. Turrets is a curse, but it is controllable, it takes tons of practice and finding people that are true friends, not necessarily people that "understand", lets be honest, if you do not have turrets, you do not understand how it feels.