I'm 20 years old now, but when I was in high school, I was a major outcast. I was kinda considered a nerd. I was really smart, but everyone knew I wasn't the smartest student. I had school friends, but outside of school, I really had only one good friend. He's been my "best friend" since we were 5. I say "best friend" because we hang out, play video games, and vent about school, but he doesn't know anything about me personally. No one did in high school. No one really talked to me. I wasn't teased harshly or harassed. I wasn't beaten or abused. I was just in the shadows, lonely and in pain. I went to counseling, but that didn't help. I knew mentally that I was a great person with a great heart, but I didn't feel it in my heart. So when I got out of high school, I decided to change myself. College was a new start, so I gave myself an ultimatum. Either create a new, happy me or in six months, commit suicide. So I changed my hairstyle, started dressing nicer, and used the "fake it till you make it" technique. It worked for a while. I even had my first relationship because of it. I knew that wasn't who I was, though, and slowly slipped back into a depression. So here I am today: 20 years old with an ex as my best friend who is close to not wanting me in their lives anymore. I just lost one of the greatest friends I've ever had too. A lot of my social issues come from being the loner. The kid who had "friends", but who lived lonely and played video games to survive.

I just want everyone to know that you're not alone and there are more ways of bullying besides physical and verbal assaults.