Safety is very important to everyone. I have an older brotherm he was jelous of me, so he made me feel like i am worth nothing. I did not understand that he was jelous untill it was too late. When i learned to read and write it was never good enough for my father. He just sent me away to my room. He yelled at me, saying i was not good enough. The fact is that he was really proud but wanted me to get better. He did not understand that he hurt me. I grew up this way, being told that i need to do better. When i was 9 years old things got worse. I could no longer flee to my friends at school. they all moved away. I was alone once again and became a victme. I was never a part of anything. My family pushed me away without knowing it, my friends were gone and i got bullied at school aswell. At school all the girls were against me, they eather did not let me join them, or let me so that they had something to laugh at. This one time i was sitting alone and one of the girls came over to me. She was crying and told me that the others had treated her like they treat me. I helped her and got her in a better mood. I thought i had a new friend. The next day it was like nothing have happened. The boys used to push me around, make me fall, hit me. The usual. It didnt stop untill 8th grade when i changed school. If i met them in the streets, they always laughed and sent me looks. First time i wanted to end it all was when i was 10 years old. This thought still follows me. A few years later I strat realizing all this. I saw that my father have been treating me bad and those i called friends, they hated me. If that was not already enough i saw that i can get my own father arrested for sexual harrasment twords me. This threw me off the edge. I could not take it anymore. Luckely i got myself into a mental hospital just in time. I got out just a few months ago. I am not sure if things will get better, all i can do is hope
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