me being bullied turns out later that I too bully

At first I reported incidence of bullying to the school and just like the individuals in the movie nothing was done about the situation.  I was in upper middle school at the time after moving from one town to another; not because of bullying but because of my dad's dream of being on a farm (type) of environment.

I had come from a suburban city type of environment where there was bullying but it was rare at my school anyways.  Moving to a new school meant having to make new friends and that was something I didn't do well. It started with me being on the bus and I reported things to the principle and teachers.

One day in 5th grade a bully was picking on me.  Same type of situations stated in the movie.  The only thing is is that I kicked the bully in the leg with my corrective shoes that I had to wear to correct a problem with my feet.  The shoes were hard at the tip so when I kicked the bully it hurt him and he reported it to the teacher.  The teacher then stated to the bully, "you are the one that's bullying him it's no wonder he kicked you."  The teacher not doing anything about the situation; I sat back in my desk and the student I kicked for defending myself then chose to attempt to kick me through my desk.  He bearly succeeded but did succeed in kicking me. 

Situations escalated as years progressed.  I continued to report the situations all throughout middle school but nothing was done about them.

Situations exactly the same as what is in the Bully movie.  Ultimately in High school I did not report anything and there was even more bullying being done by classmates.  In the worst of it there was a substitute teacher being put in place of the regular teacher who was taking a leave of absence for medical issues.

In this class was the worst of the entire class as the first day of the substitute being there; spit balls everyday for six months were being thrown not only at me but all over the class mostly centering on me and the teacher.  Desks thrown all over the class, chairs, and other objects in class room.  Ultimately in a last ditch effort to fit in as I had not participated in their escapades until now; I threw one spit ball at someone.  Albeit was a small spit ball I still threw it and they ratted on me to the substitute teacher.  The substitute teacher being hundreds of spit balls already on the floor and desks still out of place because everyday the students would throw them out of place; the students ratted to the sub on me for throwing one spit ball.  I then got scolded by the sub and was told to pick up my one spit ball out of the hundreds that were on the floor already.  Screaming in class, throwing desks, as well as spit balls.  One day a student threw one big spit ball at me and it hit me in the right side of my glasses and stuck there.  Everyone in the class laughed but it made me run out of the class in tears to the counselor where we supposedly attempted to get me out of that class.  But supposedly I was "locked in" that class and could not get out of it.

Situations as stated in the movie went on for years.  The worst it got was in the case in point stated above in the previous class "English." The teacher eventually came back.  And although things quieted down much there still were some issues.  I couldn't wait to get out of high-school.  I was told at my senior year that I could graduate in January because of early graduation credits were enough to where I could do this.  So I did.  I didn't go to my graduation ceremony. 

Just to let everyone know my dad married my mothers sister after my mother passed away of cancer when I was 16.  It made for an interesting situation and an interesting future for I had no future.  I learned nothing in school and it was the biggest waste of time I think I will ever go through.

I ultimately took and was the bully myself for up until such time as my mother passed away I was the bully to my grandmother.  Virtually everyday screaming and throwing pillows at my grandmother; I too had the honor of being the bully that I so hated going to school for being picked on. 

After my dad married my aunt things only got worse with the relationship between my dad, aunt, grandmother and school.  After I turned 18 I left my dads house and moved in on my own only to move back in with my dad after I turned 19 because I couldn't afford the rent.  Things got worse with my life after I turned 20 and although I care not to go into details after I turned 20; I feel I am forever scarred by the bullying as well as me being the bully.  I liked being the bully but hated being bullied. 

I do not endorse bullying anymore nor did I then I was just a kid not really understanding the difference between the two for I had fun bullying but it was not fun to be bullied.  I have a unique perspective on things having had been both but if you bully a person may commit suicide.  I know I thought of it and tried it twice.  I am now on medication and on disability for psych illnesses.

I have a weird family, it was a weird school, and me, I have turned out to be somewhat weird.  It's the way its always been for me in life; except before the age of 10 when we still lived in a suburban city life.  I still remain confused as to weather I like living the suburban life or farm type of lifestyle.  I have also considered myself bi-sexual or perhaps even more; its difficult to ascertain as to what I am actually.  That is also confused.

And to answer the question of if I was sexually molested.  I was at the age of about 5 but I do not consider it a big deal.  It was between a 13 year old family member and me 5 years old.  Just a highly sexual teen I suppose.  But it was two teenagers that picked on me in the suburban lifestyle too.  Two teens on the same block as me just a few house down from where I was.  I was scared of these two.  Very scared.  My mother tried to do something about the situation but with no avail.  They still bullied me.

I hope that some of what I say helps some folks out.  My situation is slightly different than most.  But what goes around comes around saying is true.

Take care all.



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