I've always been the overweight and socially awkward kid. And being bullied is almost second nature to me, that I don't even register it anymore. I got so used to walking into a room, and hearing whispers about me, or walking down the street and having things shouted at me. I'm 21 years old now, and things are still said to me. I grew up in a society where being overweight was disgusting or repulsive, or could even be considered a disease that could be caught. At one point, it got to be so bad, that I was beaten merely because I was fat and in the wrong place at the wrong time....I was 9. Apparently my appearance and my size was everyone's business and they felt entitled to voice their opinions. Even parents of the children/teenagers that bullied me had things to say. School was a living hell for me, and if I hadn't had such a strong, nosy, caring mother, I probably wouldn't have made it through it all. So when I graduated high school, I thought it would finally be over....well I was most definitely wrong. I went to college, and it still continued there. I kept thinking to myself, when does it end? When do people realize that my appearance, my weight, my clothing, my personality, is none of their darn business. And then finally, one day, I snapped and stood up for myself. People never underestimated me or harassed me, they left me alone because they knew that hadn't broken me.
I made friends along the way, friends that didnt judge me for being socially awkward or being overweight. And they've held my hand through this whole thing. But the person I give the most credit to for all my strength, is my mother. She helped me climb out of a black hole that I never thought was possible. I talked to anyone that would listen to my story, to make people aware of what was happening. Sometimes it made things better, sometimes it made things worse. But when you hold the pain and suffering inside, it only does more damage to your soul. Dont ever be afraid to let it all out. The tears, the rage, the hurt, the pain, everything. Find ONE person you trust, and tell them everything. Even if you cant form words, just cry. Someone out there will hear you, and help you stand up for yourself. Give you the courage you never thought you had. Its okay to be vulnerable, to be afraid.
Sometimes you have to find someone that is willing to be the voice you dont have. And that's okay too. I wish someone had the courage to stand up for me when I was going through all of this. So dont suffer in silence, tell someone.
By writing some words below, you are showing your support and letting everyone know they're not alone.