I've only been in a few fights in my life and they all happened with the same person and at a young age. When I was young and looking at the surface of this, because he was the one that "started" the fights and came after me, I looked at it like it was his fault. As I have grown older, and really honestly looked at the situation, I've realized that there were many people to blame in the situation, including myself. For years I viewed this as myself being an innocent bystander and wondered why he had come after me. As I became honest with myself I realized I had made myself a target because I, along with others, had made fun of him for various reasons over the years. We justified it because he had done some mean things to myself and others over the years as well, but we had both created a dichotomy where 2 wrongs just kept adding up to many wrongs. Maybe my actions didn't justify the attacks that ensued but I certainly played a role and had made myself a target because of my cruel actions.
I'll never forget the day I realized that there were some outside influences as well. We had been in our second and worst fight and we were both sent to the principal. He was in her office and was informed that his parents would be contacted. He immediately began screaming no and crying. I still remember the blood curdling screams of "He's going to hit me". He kept screaming no and those words over and over again. It became clear that day that he was the way he was because someone else had taught him that. As you get older and hear the rumors of what he had been through in his own home, if only half of them are true, it's no wonder he was an angry and violent kid.
No situation is as cut and dry as it appears on the surface. It is important to be honest with yourself and have compassion for those that are involved, sometimes there are many sides to the story.
By writing some words below, you are showing your support and letting everyone know they're not alone.