Ever since kindergarten, I was an outcast. I've never really fit in with anyone. But ever since kindergarten I've been bullied. I have been called names, had food thrown at me, been pushed around, laughed at, and teased. I thought things would be better when I changed schools for first grade. I was wrong. Things only got worse. I had absolutely no friends for the majority of the year. I eventually met one. We were close all the way through sixth grade. I was still bullied all of those years. My family decided it would be a good idea to relocate from Atlanta to Wyoming. I thought that maybe things would finally be better. By this point, I had gotten glasses and "nerd" became one of the names I was called. I went to a small private school in the town we lived in. I had no friends for my entire seventh grade year. We didn't have lockers, we had cubbies. This gave the opportunity for people to steal my belongings. An entire middle school, consisting of around 45 kids, was against me. I was always called ugly and nerdy. I still put up with having food thrown at me at lunchtime. I would go home, act normal, but cry myself to sleep. In the middle of the school year, I was diagnosed with a stomach disease with which I can't digest certain foods, so I end up vomiting when that happens. For a long time, I actually became anorexic because of that and because I got tired of being called fat. I am 5' 3" and I weighed 105 pounds at the time. I got all the way down to 89, and was still called fat. The end of the year finally came, and I switched to public school for 8th and 9th grade. Those weren't a whole lot better. The bullying still continued, but I had around five or six true friends, so I guess you could say things were going better than they were in middle school. During 10th grade we moved back to Atlanta. I, again, thought things would be better. I didn't have many friends for a long time, but eventually I got a few and things were going good. On August 17th, 2012, the first Friday of junior year, I was kidnapped and carjacked while picking up my dad from work. I have been diagnosed with Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. A few months ago, I had to be taken out of school for bullying because of panic attacks in the middle of class. School was stressful, and people who knew about it (that I thought were my friends), kept scaring me. They knew what made me panic, and that was used against me. I left school and I now do online school. I am still bullied. I am sent text messages and Facebook messages saying I'm "weak" and "a baby" because I "can't deal with my problems". They call me other names as well, but I'm not going to mention those on here. I plan to do Dual-Enrollment next year so that I don't have to go back to school there. I still have a few remaining loyal friends who support me through everything and are still trying to help me overcome the PTSD. I hope things will get better soon, but right now I can't escape, and I'm just holding on by a thread.
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