I was the target of several adult bullies when I was a divorced mother with two children ages 9 and 12, and then again by one when I was 57. At first, I had difficulty understanding why these people were harassing me, because I never experienced being bullied in school or at home during my childhood. When I looked back, I also saw that I had the same difficulty understanding why my first husband (the father of my kids) was abusive towards me, because I had never experienced abuse at the hands of my parents or any other family member. I had taken on their blame, thinking that I did something wrong or mean to warrant their threats and aggressive behavior towards me, not understanding that they did not have any right to be mentally, emotionally and physically violent towards me. It took me a long time to understand that I didn’t DO anything to merit such behavior from anyone, and to build up my self-esteem, reclaiming my pride. I could go into detail here about what happen, but it has moved from being a source of pain, self-doubt, shame and guilt to one of a story far in the past which happened to another person I barely recognize anymore. Living with Parkinson’s disease is quite enough to deal with, so I don’t punish myself for merely doing what I had to do at that time in order to protect my children and to keep what was left of my family intact. My children are happy, strong and healthy physically, mentally and emotionally now as adults, and that is what is important to me. After the last adult bully who thought that I was an easy victim to take his rage out on because of my Parkinson’s - not understanding the battle I had already gone through in facing my own morality – vain attempts to scare me, I know what bullies fear the most: losing control of the situation and of authorities, especially of the law. The Housemates from Hell moved out rather quickly after I called in the sheriff.
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