Always a Reason

I was one of the biggest kids in my class in grade school. I was never picked on by the kids on my class but most certainly by the older kids. They simply assumed that i was just a small fifth grader instead of a big first grader. I was physically and verbally abused by all of the older kids and eventually the younger kids started doing it too. I never told my mom because when I was younger I was always told to suck it up and she was always happy when i acted tough. But eventually it got so bad that I was being strangled to the pint to where i was left unconscious at the bus stop and an older gentleman found me and contacted the police. We moved after that. At the new school, I took a different approach from the one i had before. I took the side of the bully. I wore a mean face through most of third grade. I was eventually stopped by a kid who would later become my best friend. I can't remember what he said, but it must have been good to make me stop, because i did. But when i dropped my tough act, I was immediately targeted again. I was mostly made fun of because of my weight and how big i always looked. For the rest of elementary school i became very detached. I only talked to my few friends and no one else. In middle school, i knew no one and was targeted yet again for my awkwardness and weight. I was liked by a few people due to my joking nature. IN eighth grade i attempted suicide. My mom was out of town, and i grabbed a rope and tied it to the  ceiling fan. Have i ever mentioned my weight? because that was my ultimate downfall... Literally. I fixed it before my mom got home and acted like nothing ever happened. I'm in tenth grade now and I'm still feeling the hate. But I know that eventually things will get better. Maybe it will be tomorrow. Maybe ten years from now. But I know things will all be okay.

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